I can’t cope

[tyme]

@Captain24 ,

I've sent you an email with updates.

[Captain24]

I do speak like that at times just not quite as scrambled egg like! @tyme I’m rambling a lot but I hope I’m more coherent? 

If I get that erratic just remind me it could be an episode! It was mania. I took the correct prn for it and it has settled. 

I am ridiculously stressed and the fear of not getting myself ready is huge. I’m also really scared about going back in. The closer it gets the more scared I get. I haven’t admitted just how scared I am until now. I really am not ok. I am really struggling.

Just found out that they might operate on dad tomorrow. Because he is on blood thinners he has to stay in for a few days. I’m letting my parents down by being away. They need me. Plus they are suppose to be going on holidays on Tuesday. 

Pix is really annoying me right now, Jett is sitting on my lap asleep and Keiko is in a bed asleep. @rav3n. I can’t even go to bed early as Keiko doesn’t go to bed until 11.

[Eve7]

Thinking of you @Captain24 

💚💛💚

[Captain24]

Thanks @Eve7 

I hope you are doing ok…

[rav3n]

i hear you @Captain24. we're happy to remind you next time, so great that you've been able to identify that!

if those fears are making you feel unsafe at any point, please reach out to a support service (i'll attach the services at the end). you're feelings are valid and matter, and speaking to a crisis line will give you the space to release some of those feelings you've been holding in. 

Lifeline 13 11 14 https://www.lifeline.org.au/ 
Lifeline Text Support 0477 131 114 https://www.lifeline.org.au/crisis-text/ 
Suicide Call Back Service 1300 659 467 
https://www.suicidecallbackservice.org.au/ 
If feeling unsafe, please contact 000

Wow you've got 3 furbabies? Hope they let you sleep earlier tonight 😊

[tyme]

Don't forget to take a breath @Captain24 .

Are you expecting too much from yourself?

Yeah, my spoken language is terrible now... totally scrambled

[Eve7]

Thanks @Captain24 

I’m getting there…slowly but still in hospital. Hope to be out next week if all my ducklings line up.

Do you have anything on this weekend?

[Captain24]

I’ve got mums dog too @rav3n. She has to be with me until mum can come

home on Sunday afternoon. 

Yes I’m putting to much pressure on

myself @tyme. I always do. I expect too

much but it doesn’t matter as it all has to be done. 

Is it easier in hospital the second time? I’m really freaking out. Sorry 

[Captain24]

I hope they do for you @Eve7

Are you allowed leave? 

Im just going to get ready to go in, clean the house as much as you can with 3 dogs. 

[tyme]

Hey @Eve7 ,

How are you going? Sorry you are in hospital again. 

How has it been? I'm here if you need a chat.

@Captain24 , I found the second time easier. Each time was easier and it took less time to settle so more of the recovery work could be done.