I'm in a nest

[CheerBear]

Absolutely agree. Interestingly though, I find written text a bit easier most of the time at the moment because, as I'm sure you're way too familiar with too, add things like trauma into it and the whole rule book goes out the window with non-verbal cues.

Interesting to think of the way we are all adapting text based communication to counter the barrier re lack of non-verbal cues as well. Emojis is a great example of that.

I'm a huge believer in straight out asking someone to further clarify what they meant by something to reduce the potential for miscommunication like this. But even that can be problematic as it seems to sometimes produce an almost defensive response, unless of course that's just my interpretation of the response too. And there's a fine example of how quickly interactions can turn messy, and why sometimes I find books and cats better company than people! @Spookytookims

[Spookytookims]

@CheerBearabsolutely...   re the defensive thing and the emojis   I try to use emojis to show my intent is jocular because I know at times without it my words, though intended facetious, can be taken seriously and that can cause misunderstandings.  But sometimes people ignore the emojis anyhow... because there are anti emoji people... I know that because in my class forums a lot of people are really anti emojis especially younger people which I find quite interesting and surprised me.

and yes..   in general I find people can get defensive when questioned.  I think to some people it's like they take it that you are questioning what they are saying and that's another thing I've been covering in my set resources in the past weeks.   How we become emotionally attached to certain beliefs and it can feel like being attacked personally if they are questioned or others don't have the same ones.

I find that amazing because the way I think is if someone questions what I am saying they are interested enough to want to clarify it, or they want more information about it.  But it seems some people use it and feel it in ways I had never thought of.

[Phoenix_Rising]

@CheerBear I am super glad that you are safely at home with your LF. I get the sense that the meeting was super challenging but the outcome is that so long as you don't indicate intent, things should settle down without anything too scary happening, is that right? I can definitely relate to all those scary feelings about not knowing whether the helping people are safe or not. It can be super scary and confusing. I hope you can feel safe with your psychologist. I know what a giant difference it can make to have just one super safe person in your corner.

@Spookytookims Your toilet/toolkit muddle made me laugh a lot. I really can't imagine any context in which I might put a rainbow walk in my toilet. Oh great, now I have an image in my brain of a rainbow in my toilet and me jumping onto it to take a ride to the ocean - all drains lead to the ocean you know. Clearly talk of a rainbow walk in a toilet triggers scenes from Finding Nemo in my brain - I had to mention that, given your current interest in language, triggers etc.

[CheerBear]

I missed that other post @Spookytookims. I was completely totally exhausted, like almost couldn't move earlier. But it's passed a little now. My body is very much responding to the stress, and thinking about that reminds me how I seriously didn't need additional stress, especially to this extent, especially when it's come from me reaching out for a little bit of help. I have a house inspection to clean for, the big housing meeting on Wednesday and haven't been able to sort out that c-link hiccup so again, this is why this is just not ok timing.

Catt are lingering around for a bit. It means calls and maybe home visits. I have an appt with their psychiatrist on Thursday as "you really need to see a doctor". The whole thing sends me completely bananas and is taking hours to come down from that hyped up run style panic bunny thing. Then I crash and fall flat for a while. Then stabilise with just enough time to come good for a moment before it happens again. Shaking my head. There's surely a better way than this. I am absolutely worse off mentally since Friday and this is a giant epic step backwards but another thing to tick that I've survived once I have. I

If only pineapple lumps had the nutritional value of broccoli then at least something good comes out of it lol.

There's my venty response 😕 Betchya glad you asked now sorry!

[Spookytookims]

oh hey @Phoenix_Rising  that's really strange you have now mentioned nemo twice,.   and the guide in the Turtle island story in episode 5 that showed you and lil-cat to the wreck I named enmo....   as an anagram of nemo.  😛  just have to mention that for synchronistic purposes 🙂

[CheerBear]

Helllloooo @Phoenix_Rising and thank you 🙂 I'm not sure if things are settling or if the catt scaries are getting ready to pounce so I'm tiptoeing carefully and remembering I trust two helping people, and I do trust them (neither have called triage on me) so they're being great sounding boards right now. I've been fairly fiercely defending a similar mindset to how I think you see things sometimes. Which is kind of that while I have this 'option' and I'm not taking it, I feel like I'm consciously making a choice to be here. If that 'option' is made to be handed over, I won't feel so much like I am choosing to live, more like I am stuck here. That mindset doesn't sit so nicely with big scary catt people though. How are you tonight? Have you moved on from porridge dinners to something else now?

@Spookytookims - something else I enjoy about your company is exactly what you've written there. I feel like I could ask you to clarify something and you'd take it that way, as I would if someone asked me. Yay!

[Spookytookims]

I am glad I asked @CheerBear  the biggest most draining thing is the darn cycle...  that rainbow or not so freakin' rainbow roller coaster.  If that could just stop happening you might get a chance to breath and gain a little equilibrium.

Meanwhile @Phoenix_Rising is now surfing that to the ocean via her toilet apparently 👀

[CheerBear]

Can you both please come and work for my local catt people, who told me the name catt had a bad reputation so they just changed it (so much lol) and teach them how to work with shaky little boats?!

[Spookytookims]

@CheerBear  lol you know how I hate authority and systematic controls....   I'm thinking really really not a good thing for them or me to live under their rules 😛  *shakes*  uh huh no thanks.. sorry  😛

[CheerBear]

Yeah i can't play nicely enough to ever join most of the systems I want to (to change) either @Spookytookims 😁