Not Coping

[Jynx]

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@Birdofparadise8 wrote:

That's a good idea. You'll cry lots then. I cried a little I don't like crying when I'm around people. @Jynx 

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Aye fair enough, though in a cinema is probably the most socially acceptable spot to cry! 

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 I haven't seen the first one yet lol. 

Did you get good tickets for the footy? 

I'll be screaming for Carlton on Friday 😁💙

[Birdofparadise8]

First part of message was for you @ArraDreaming 

I know but I still didn't cry as much as I would on my own. @Jynx 

Oh really enjoy watching that one @ENKELI 

[ArraDreaming]

Oh

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 I don't want to cry! 

I'll have to see where I can watch the first one. Did you see my message about the footy?

[Birdofparadise8]

It's on Disney @ENKELI 

Yes we can yell together. 

All good @ArraDreaming 

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 thanks for that princess. I still have Disney, never ended up cancelling it lol. I am considering cancelling Netflix but then I'll find something I want to watch and decide to keep it for another month. 

With your roommates do you have to share TV or do you have one in your room?

I had a TV in my room as well as 1 in the loungeroom but since I moved back to my house the TV hasn't worked 😒

No flipping idea what they did to it.

I hope Carlton absolutely thrash the cats🤣

How have you been feeling today sweetie?

[Birdofparadise8]

Cool you'll have to watch it before you go and see the new one. 

I use the TV in the lounge room. I don't have one in my room @ENKELI 

It would be nice. What size would you suggest? 

Oh, can your brother help? 

Yes, I hope so too, so we stay second and rub it in my uncle's face. 

I'm not at tired as yesterday and days prior so that is good. I didn't hear back from pdoc today so maybe tomorrow, but I'm not taking that new med while on the other that is interacting. 

Mentally, I've been so busy other than when I cried in the movie. I kept thinking about how I relate to sadness so much and wish more joy was in my mind. 

I am watching Grey's Anatomy, but the other day, I watched an episode where someone hurt themselves, and it really triggered my SI. I still think about it, but oh well. I'll let my psych know tomorrow. 

[ENKELI]

@Birdofparadise8 please please tell your psych about your SI. You have too much to live for my darling girl. I feel like shaking your sad and telling it to buzz off forever! 

Keep going sweetie, there are lots of people who want you around. Like me, Arra, Jynx, and everyone else you chat with here. 

I'm not sure what I'd do without our daily chats 🤔

Do you know it's nearly 6 months since we started chatting? We should have a 6 month celebration! I'll try and track the exact date.

You are so important to me, both my mum and my brother know about you and I've even mentioned "my friend in Melbourne" to the girls at work, especially when we're talking about the afl.

It's nearly time for you to sign off my princess, I hope you get a good sleep tonight and I'll be sure to check in on you during the day.

I'm off to make my lunch for work and time for my night meds. God bless princess 

👑🫂💙💐👸🙏

[Birdofparadise8]

I know I'm sorry @ENKELI 

I just can't help the thoughts and feel people would be better off without me. (I'm safe right now by the way). 

I'm not sure if shaking my head would help. Sorry. 

Yeah, I know. I love our chats, too, but outside of you and me, I don't have a lot to live for right now. 

I think it has been 6 months. It t was the 3rd of December I just looked. 

Aww, you talk about me a lot. That is so sweet. 
Thank you, enkeli yes, I better go now. 

I'll reply to your reply from this in the morning. 

You mean the world to me I would be lost without you and I you would feel the same. I'm sorry I feel the way I do, but know I am going anywhere at the moment.