Riding a wave

[Phoenix_Rising]

@CheerBear I am SUPER glad we don't live on Venus. Today has been HARD...but better for being with you and Puffer fish. I can't wait to see the picture.

I went and collected (P)'s ashes this morning. The small family-run pet cemetary & crematorium I go to is AMAZING. They are SO good. I told the guy that I definitely was not expecting to see him again only 11 months since I was last there. I sure as heck don't want to see him again for a looooooong time now.

@CheerBear and @Zoe7 can I whisper something here? Things went terribly horribly wrong with a BM when I "reached out" via phone both on Thursday night and Friday night. I'm pretty sure RP had to make an emergency dash back from Mexico to deal with the fallout. I'm not sure who was more distressed, me or the BM. My understanding is that RP is going to be giving some intensive lessons in how to speak turtle. I super super hope so. Do you understand?

[CheerBear]

I understand @Phoenix_Rising and guessed that may have happened. I am thankful there are people who will help with speaking turtle lessons. I hope it will be helpful.

I really hope you don't see the people at the crematorium again for a long time too. 😞

[Phoenix_Rising]

@CheerBear I super badly want to talk to you more about it, but I figure it probably isn't appropriate. I will be talking it through with my turtle whisperer on Tuesday (which feels a billion years away right now). It has made me all the more terrified about seeing therapist-take-thirteen because I have such a talent for making people get frustrated and defensive when I really and truly don't mean to. I'm thinking that it might be best for my turtle whisperer to talk to therapist-take-thirteen before I do, so that she might be able to explain some of the muddle.

I am super sad about your house situation. The pocket crew and I will definitely be with you to keep anyone out. Maybe you could throw me and the rest of the crew at the person's head and we will cling to their face until they run away. That makes a funny image in my brain.

[Zoe7]

@CheerBear Nice to hear/see about your day. You can never find the right sized box when you need to  Book is still on the floor with LP  I hope I can join in a little with you both this week too 

@Phoenix_Rising Completely understand re: BM I am pretty sure I 'chatted' with the same BM on Friday night little turtle. I am so sorry BM didn't speak turtle and I am sure she was not feeling at all good about that either  I can say that she was a great help to me - so all is not lost there! With some extra help from RP I think she is quite capable of learning to speak turtle - she definitely has potential 

[CheerBear]

There have been so many times when I've wanted to be able to talk you not here @Phoenix_Rising. I adore our forum not-friendship, but can sometimes feel frustrated that it is this way. I can definitely understand why it might make it feel even more terrifying to think about therapist take thirteen. We have a similar talent for what you mentioned, I think, in our own way. I truly know you really don't mean to do it too.

So when my landlord rode past today, I did have a moment thinking that I was glad you were in my pocket and not in my hand for that very reason 😛 Thank you also for being part of the crew stopping anyone from coming in (I figured you'd be right there even if you didn't say it). I am glad we can be together but not through the muddles 🙂

[Phoenix_Rising]

@Zoe7 I guess we can't know if we spoke to the same BM (and I don't think it would be helpful to try and figure it out). On Thursday night the phone got passed to RP and on Friday night it got passed to someone else and RP checked in via email soon afterwards. By the time the phone got passed, I was in utter chaos...as in screaming at the top of my lungs chaos.

I am thinking about starting a new thread for the sole purpose of telling my whole story (the bits I choose to share in Forum Land) so that it is there in one place for me to refer anyone to. I do understand that my muddle is huge and that it is super hard for a BM to get their head around it - particularly when we are speaking for the first time during the major crisis of (P)'s passing.

@CheerBear I just saw the pictures. I super super SUPER love them. My favourite one is where I am "meeting" Puffer fish. I am a little scared about being on the lawnmower but I trust you to keep me safe. I am curious to know how you explained my existence to Puffer fish.

[CheerBear]

Totally safe always @Phoenix_Rising 😛 It's amazing to think of the amount of places you've found yourself in, yet you're still fully in one piece 😉

I asked PF if they'd like to see something special but said they had to be very gentle. It was a gooey moment 🙂

[Zoe7]

Yep got it @Phoenix_Rising 

I also know who 'was on' so have a pretty good idea around all this.

I cannot imagine how hard both nights were for you little turtle and I am sorry that it escalated so much - that is definitely not what you needed (yes an understatement I know). It really would be extremely hard for a BM to get 'their head around' what is happening for you when it is your first time speaking - I feel for both of you - just an unavoidable situation (in the circumstances) that infact made your muddle worse (and that sucks for all involved). 

I think a thread that you/we can direct BMs, or even members to, that would help in understanding a little more how to speak turtle, is a great idea. I am very happy to help you with this if yiou what to 'bounce' some thoughts off me before posting (sure you don't need that - but offer is there). 

[Zoe7]

Goodnight @Phoenix_Rising and @CheerBear.

Need to go - stupid meds and their side effects 

Chat soon 

[Phoenix_Rising]

Good night @Zoe7. I will be heading off soon too. Thank you for being so super good at speaking turtle.