Riding a wave

[Shaz51]

ohhh @Phoenix_Rising , I am flying around having a look my friend

[Phoenix_Rising]

I don't understand why the guys from the HC seem to not be email-talking or Forum Land talking to me now either. We are supposed to still be able to email and Forum Land talk even though we can't talk talk. I'm pretty sure it doesn't count as a pathological fear of abandonment when the objective reality is that everyone DOES go away. 

[Catcakes]

You are right @Phoenix_Rising

everyone does go away eventually

but today, I happen to be around and taking it easy

maybe the mods are tied up with someone else

or maybe they’re tied up😳

its a beautiful sunny day where I am

[Phoenix_Rising]

@Catcakes Thursdays are super super super hard because Thursday used to be phone SANE day. I haven't talk talked to anyone since I saw TTT on Monday, and I won't talk talk to anyone until I see her again next Tuesday. Phoning time was a super important source of support for me and without it I am ultra struggling. The tiny consolation is supposed to be that we can still Forum Land talk...but for whatever reason that hasn't happened yet today and I don't understand why. 

[Catcakes]

I hear you @Phoenix_Rising

it must feel awful not knowing the reason why you haven’t been able to get the HC to communicate with you.

hope you can hang in there, there may be a perfectly reasonable explanation.

i get anxious and irritable too when I’m expecting communication that doesn’t happen

im getting some craft work done today

[Phoenix_Rising]

@Catcakes thank you for understanding. Yep, it's super hard not to get anxious when you have had a bazillion past experiences of a delay in response resulting in further abandonment and loss. I've had so many experiences of being hurt over the past three months, that it now feels like I'm just waiting to get hurt again. I'm feeling frustrated because I've been making an extra super big effort to engage in Forum Land this week. I am definitely safest when I don't try to connect - it is the only way I seem to be able to be confident I won't get hurt further. 

[Phoenix_Rising]

Tried calling TTT. Gone home. No one. No one. No one. No one. No one. No one in the whole Universe to talk talk to and now not Forum Land talk either. PR too bad. PR freak. PR freak. PR freak. PR freak. 

[Shaz51]

Ohhhhh @Former-Member, ohhh @Former-Member where areeeeeee youuu

sitting with you @Phoenix_Rising

[Catcakes]

I don’t see you as a freak @Phoenix_Rising.
Do you sometimes get a response when you call TTT?
I’m not allowed to call my therapist at all, or email and I can text only if it’s about an appointment I need to change.
The other day I was running really late, it takes me about 55 mins to get there but the traffic was horrendous and it was more like 65 mins +
I did a naughty and texted gunna be late to my therapist and she called me to say, just drive carefully and I’ll wait in the waiting room. This helped a lot. It’s very rare she calls me, she also knows the stress I have been under.
I’m sorry that you still haven’t had a reply from HC. Maybe there’s people on duty that don’t know the rules/exceptions/needs of a scared turtle.
🌿

[Former-Member]

Sorry for the delay @Phoenix_Rising I am here, just multi-tasking 🙂