Am Not Coping

[TheVorticon]

I hope your visit to the GP went well and you were able to tell her about what's been going on @Zoe7.

If you don't mind, I'm going to hang out silently for a bit in my lego corner of the octagon room.

[Zoe7]

@Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Former-Member @CheerBear @Shaz51 @TheVorticon @utopia and everyone else (sorry - my mind is not working!!)

Thankyou everyone for your thoughts and sentiments - it means so much to me. I can't stay - I am still really struggling and I need to try to sleep. I will catch up with everyone later when I am in a better space and am more able to think and respond. 

@Faith-and-Hope I hope you have finished your painting and you enjoy your night out tonight - and your time with your Dad the next few days. Will be thinking of you even if we don't connect over the next few days 

@TheVorticon enjoy your time in your lego corner - nice to see you around 

[Shaz51]

thinking of you sister @Zoe7 and holding your hand

[STORMGRL101]

I hope you can get some decent sleep @Zoe7 ❣️🌹💞😴😴😴

[utopia]

@Zoe7. Sending love. ♥♥

[Owlunar]

Hi @Zoe7

Like @Shaz51 I am sitting with you and holding your hand

Or do you have a parrot on one shoulder and an owl on the other

Whichever - we are here and we have had our own rough bits so yes - I can tell that it's really hard for you

Dec

[Faith-and-Hope]

@Zoe7 ..... I have to head off soon to see my dad .... thinking of you ....  💚💐💕🤗🤗🤗

[Phoenix_Rising]

{Wanders into TOR with weighted blanket and toy turtle. Snuggles into corner and watches @TheVorticon build cool stuff out of lego. Super grateful that @Zoe7 built TOR}. My shell is all full up with missing-CherryBomb feelings. Thank you everyone for not thinking I'm weird or bad for struggling with this more than...well...the entire bazillion people in Forum Land. I am really self-conscious of the fact that my very obviously borderline abandonment issues have exploded into full view on the forum and I am SUPER grateful that the giant feelings have been respected and that a plan was put in place to help me process the grief. This is such a very VERY different experience for me, compared to a thousand past experiences of being criticised and shamed for my big feelings, as though that was somehow going to make me stop having them. I know that being so well supported through the big feelings, will make them settle a thousand times quicker than being shamed for them ever would.

[Eden1919]

@Zoe7 I hope you are ok I am here if you need 

[Zoe7]

@Eden1919 @Faith-and-Hope @utopia @Phoenix_Rising @Owlunar @Shaz51 @Former-Member @CheerBear @Former-Member

I tried to sleep early tonight but was woken as usual so now I am up and in the same place I have been for so long now. I don't know what to do anymore. I go back to my GP on Monday and she is going to call my psychiatrist if I have been the same over the weekend. I could have told her it wouldn't change - why would it - it has been going on for so long. She could see how bad I had fallen as soon as she saw me on Friday but it was too late to call the psych. I feel like I can't take a trick at the moment. I am doing everything asked of me by my GP and psychiatrist but I am not improving and I am beyond even caring. I actually slept last night and did a little housework this morning - but that exhausted me after only an hour or so. That just adds to my frustration and sadness - I can't do anything!!!!! My trip away has definitely added to my setback as I was not well enough to go and it was extremely exhausting both physically and mentally. What next???? I can't find any positivity in my life at all at the moment!