Am Not Coping

[outlander]

Ok... my pops surgury is tomorrow.... i am just about to be moving my horse back where i was having all those troubles before-not sure if tou remember but things got tense between my mother and a few other agistees because of aomething i said and they still have no idea of that. Peace keeping now that has come back to bite me in the backside.
Then i have had a major flareup of my physical injuries resulting in a home gp last night and extra strong pain relief with a sedative in it. And just finished having a panic attack and now having the after effects like chest pain and colicy type symptoms.
Think that summarises it... @Zoe7

[Zoe7]

That is a pretty good summary @outlander. Now the trick is to not look at it as a whole but break it down into the things you can 'control' and those you can't. 

You can 'control' the pain a little with medication - not ideal or a fix but an easing (however small).

You can control your breathing and reduce the pressure in your chest from the panic attack - slow, deep, focussed breaths. Concentrating only on breathing in slowly and out slowly. That will also reduce your heart-rate and lessen the chance of another panic attack.

You cannot control what other people think or say - as much as these things hurt - they are not YOU - you are what you know of yourself (and no negatives here - you are a creative, caring, compassionate and hard working young women - they are facts that cannot be disputed as we have seen this time and time again here)

You cannot control the outcome of your Pop's surgery - you can worry about how it will go but the outcome is not something you can control. Tell yourself that yoiu know there are risks and the prognosis may not be great but you deal with that when you actually know.

Above all @outlander stay calm - composure in difficult situations can calm both the body and the mind 

[outlander]

Yeah i know. Sometimes things just boil over and the steams gotta go aomewhere. @Sans911 gave me the idea of a worry box and ive been using that for a few things which has been really helpful but tonight my mother set me off and it brought up all the stuff that was shoved down previously that i couldnt solve while peacekeeping and overflowed the cup and couldnt regain myself. Im abit better now. Could be the pain meds with sedative lol but anything helping is good.
Im suppose to be up at 5am too. Tryng to beat the heat for tomorrow. @Zoe7

[Zoe7]

Try to get some rest then @outlander and hopefully some sleep. Take tomorrow when it comes 

[outlander]

Thanks ❤
No sleep for me. At least not yet. Still wide awake
😞 i hope.your able to get some rest though @Zoe7 ❤

[Zoe7]

resting is just as important as slepping @outlander - and I'm sure you already know thi but blue screens from computers and phones are not conducive to sleep - they stimulate the brain - that is why resting away from screens for a while before trying to sleep is important

[outlander]

Yeah i know. Im logging off soon. Ive come to stop fighting for sleep atm..
If im.not tired i wont sleep anyway im awake for hrs even if i was to turn it all off now i dont think id sleep @Zoe7

[Zoe7]

goodluck @outlander I'm logging off soon too 

[outlander]

Good luck to you too ❤

[Zoe7]

@Faith-and-Hope