Riding a wave

[Former-Member]

Hi @Phoenix_Rising,

I'm sorry to hear that there are gigantic feelings happening for you tonight. I'm glad that you got to speak with your turtle whisperer and come up with a plan for the night. It's completely okay to have today as a write-off and start again fresh tomorrow. I hope tomorrow is a better day but for tonight I am watching over the ocean waiting for calmer seas on the horizon.

[CheerBear]

I hope you're feeling snuggled up and safe in your shell tonight, and sleeping well at the moment @Phoenix_Rising. It's only 2.5 hours until tomorrow now (I checked that maths with puffer fish 😉 ).

Thanks for the handbag/pocket company today.

Night my not-friend 🙂

[Faith-and-Hope]

@Phoenix_Rising ..... 🌷🐢

[Phoenix_Rising]

Good morning @Former-Member @Former-Member @Shaz51 @CheerBear @Faith-and-Hope and anyone else out on the ocean this morning,

Yay for not living on Venus. I had a good night's sleep and I am ready to keep on keeping on...whatever that may look like. 

I saw my turtle whisperer yesterday afternoon. She had previously assured me that she would be there for twelve months (which would mean until September next year). Yesterday she told me that she really has no idea when she will no longer be able to work with me in the way that we are. Thus I'm back to having absolutely no stability in my world. If my turtle whisperer and I can't find me a therapist before she moves on, then that will be it for me in terms of finding anyone to help me. I simply can't do it on my own anymore and my GP is totally out of ideas. Everything now hinges on my turtle whisperer and I being able to find someone before she leaves my world...and I have no idea how soon she is going to leave. The chances of me being able to find someone to help me are now microscopic. 

Another week has gone by and we've heard nothing from the potential TTT who is demanding payment to speak to my turtle whisperer. The weeks turn into months and the months turn into years. Two-and-a-half years have passed since I left Fred. The chances of me finding someone within the next few months before my turtle whisperer leaves my world are so so so SO small. 

I'm getting worse and worse by the day. My window of tolerance is near-zero and I barely speak to other people here in the real world. I so very badly need some support here in the real world. I so very very very badly do. 

Anyway, so that's what the storm was about last night. Super big thank you for riding the waves with me. 

[Phoenix_Rising]

@CheerBear I just wanted to let you know how superly duperly happy I am for you re. your house. I am so very very VERY happy for you. 

Also, I wanted to let you know that I heard what you whispered yesterday morning. That is superly duperly awesome too. I will be interested in hearing more whisperings on that matter. 

I am hoping to post the first mindfulness post tomorrow. Yesterday's bus has super squished me, but I already have a lot written. I really just need to edit it and ensure it isn't too absurdly long. Yep, mindfulness definitely needs three weeks!

[CheerBear]

Good morning @Phoenix_Rising. It's good to hear you had a good night's sleep. 

I can so much relate to the incredible difficulty that comes with instability and how much that may contribute to an almost completely closed window closing more, which is then closed even further when days turn into weeks and weeks into months (and years -  ). It seriously sucks. I really wish there was someone helpful who could stay around in your non-virtual ocean. I know forumland is seriously great, but it isn't the same. 

Happy keeping on keeping on Tuesday (rather than Turtle Whisperer Tuesday today)

[CheerBear]

Thank you for sharing with my happiness re the house @Phoenix_Rising (and understanding that it may be a very bittersweet kind of happiness). I went into my handbag a gajillion times yesterday to get my ID and pen and notebook etc. I move a Turtle where I can see it better on days like yesterday (the rest of the pocket crew hides out in a side pocket now). The glimpses I caught were so helpful 🙂

Re the whisper, that was definitely a time when I wish whispering wasn't actually public speaking 😉 ! It's going nowhere and that's 100 million percent ok, particularly as now is a time for stopping not going. But it was fun and funny and nice in a way that isn't suffocating and not icky or scary uncomfortable like it could have been.

I am really looking forward to reading your mindfulness post whenever it happens. Long is understandable I think, given there are SO many pages in this epic adventure and so many experiences to share, things to ponder and think of etc.

The LF and I made some glitter calming down bottles last night. They're so good and a really helpful (and pretty) STOP tool. That's some of the kinds of things I wish you, me plus three could play with together.

I'll check out the other mindfulness thread properly later today, now I am less flattened 🙂

[Former-Member]

Good Morning @Phoenix_Rising

I am glad you got some sleep last night. The uncertainty of when your turtle whisperer is now leaving must be extemely difficult to handle, no wonder last nights waves were so big. It super sucks that there is so much difficulty in finding a good therapist that can help you with your muddles and be there the long time.

Even though this forum is so supportive, you do need those people in real life too. I hope that window can stay open just a little. Take care of yourself.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Your forumite compatriots are riding with you in your search  @Phoenix_Rising ..... not too close, as requested .... but nearby .....

🐢💦

[Zoe7]

@Phoenix_Rising