Riding a wave

[CheerBear]

This is definitely one of those adventures I'd love to be able to come along to @Phoenix_Rising. Hope it feels good for you tonight!

Glad you had a super productive hour 🙂

[CheerBear]

Hi @Phoenix_Rising and @Zoe7 and anyone interested in the work at DBT desk 🙂 Just adding my thoughts re the meeting this morning (which can definitely be filed away and/or gather dust if that's what happens).

Phoenix_Rising - you asked whether I might be feeling overwhelmed because I was imagining a shorter time frame or because it is daunting when batteries are low, which is a completely fair and reasonable question. This might sound a bit strange but doing things like the DBT reading/writing/adventuring kind of almost recharges my batteries (even if it takes some effort and energy to do). Maybe my recharging is more it giving me inspiration, motivation and hope. My reason for hitting the pause button on the bouncy energizer care bearing was more that I did not want to kick off the doing without getting an idea of how you and others may want to go about it.

When I mentioned to my psychologist that I was planning on "doing DBT" by reading through and practicing the skills in the manual, he made a comment about how compressing (I can't remember how many he said but it was much bigger than 2) weeks into 2 weeks would work well for me (he didn't know we are doing this together-but-not when he said that). If I was doing this as a solo adventure, that's what I would do. It's the way my brain works and is why I have found myself having read so much of the manual now. This is where maybe I am the odd one out here, which is ok with me. It's not right or wrong, just different as I think you'd say Phoenix_Rising. It gives me good practice at slowing things down that don't need to be all done all at once. I'm very ok with practicing and doing that here and think it could be a really useful thing for me to do 🙂

I do have that worry that this may be something that appears as a private conversation thing, also. I guess that the best we can do there is as you said Zoe, which is to be as inclusive and encouraging as possible, welcome any one who shows an interest, and invite anyone along who might be interested also. I had semi-drafted a kick off post when I was hit with whatever bus came at me over the last little while (I think it was one that had a giant "housing" sign written on the side). I had gone with the idea of adding open questions to the post at the end to ponder/write about/answer if wanting to, as a way of "opening up" a discussion for anyone who might be interested. It's pretty much what I've seen you do in some of the posts over there Phoenix_Rising.

I also got stuck on that first "week", which from memory is the general stuff. I didn't know what to cover or what to skip, made harder because I had covered some of it in my big overview post. I can't find the handouts online anymore (Ihave them saved on my laptop) as well and had some concern over what links could be shared here (which I meant to ask about but was run over - I will get there). Adding in to it, I had some confidence issues. Yay for overthinking melted snowflakey banana head :S (I think it should really become an official term!)

It was cool to read over the minutes of the meeting. As much as I have enjoyed "being" by the water at the desk, I am still excited about doing the do bit of this DBT adventure. I feel sad that I wasn't able to kick it off as I had planned, hoped and said I would. I think it's going to be much easier to share some of the load if/when you want, once I get an idea of what "doing" here looks like.

So I'm going to add this file now to the desk alongside the minutes of the meeting for if/when anyone wants to read 🙂

[Zoe7]

@CheerBear @CheerBear

Hi CB 

I am still going to be guided by whatever you and little turtle decide - I am not in any position to make decisin about anything just yet and for probably the first time in my life I am trusting other people to make those decisions for me - I hope this is ok for the time being.

If you can no longer find the handouts and worksheets online then I am happy to scan and post those for us ( have that book also so it is an easy thing that I can contribute).

My concentration for 'anything' for any length of time is pretty non-existent so happy to work slowly or just bits and pieces with you both as I can manage. I definitely do not want to hold either of you back in this adventure, that is why I am relying on both of you to lead the way and for me to do what I can when I can. I hope that is ok with you both.

[Phoenix_Rising]

Good evening to everyone out on the ocean. I am super struggling after my change-the-world-adventure. I cannot begin to tell you how close I came to calling someone a melted snowflakey banana head!!!!!!!!!! The only reason I'm pressing on with this adventure is because it gives me a chance to practice my distress tolerance skills. Yeah...they were super pushed to the limit tonight -grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

I am too sleepy to say much right now, but I did want to whisper something to @CheerBear: guess what CheerBear? Nobody will know how fast you zoom through the DBT skills manual by yourself at home. If you finish the entire manual before we even finish the first module in Forum Land that will be a bazillion percent ok. Oh and I definitely agree about asking open questions.

@Zoe7 I am wondering if we may all end up in gaol for breaching copywrite laws if you scan and post the worksheets in Forum Land??? I was thinking that we would post the link to each worksheet as we go. I wonder why you can't seem to find the link anymore @CheerBear. I am too sleepy now, but will suss it out tomorrow.

With this bit of guidance, do you want to have a go at doing the first bit of the doing bit CheerBear? I don't mind doing it, but I figure we should decide so that we don't both spend ages on it. Do you want to have a look at what you feel you could cover in a post-for-the-week post and then I will pick up from that point and start working on the next week? I'm hoping we might get into a rythem in time such that we both kind-of have two weeks to prepare the next bit by alternating bits - until @Zoe7 is feeling well enough to jump in and do a bit too.

Good night Forum Land. Look, I think I can see @Former-Member zooming around the ocean in her brand new bubble!!!

Good night @Former-Member. Super big thank you for watching over the ocean tonight.

[Phoenix_Rising]

Good morning @CheerBear, I am more awake now than I was last night.  I have to say, when the person said the unbelievably unhelpful thing they said at the change-the-world adventure, thinking of them as a melted snowflakey banana head helped me to have a tiny little giggle to myself and thereby avoid descending into chaos in that public place. I am definitely putting that phrase in my toolkit for how to self-soothe when people say super gigantically triggering things. 

I totally get what you said about the DBT adventure being energizing. I find that too. I think like you, it gives me a sense of inspiration and motivation. As I think we all know by now, my lack of employment prospects is a super gigantic issue in my world. Thus to me, the DBT adventure is kind of a "job" which gives me a sense of purpose etc. I super love the fact that you are a bouncy energizer care bear. 

CheerBear it made me giggle that you commented that you think you are the odd one out (because you bounce and @Zoe7 and I plod). So...you think you are the odd one out. Zoe has said before that she thinks she is the odd one out. I don't feel like the odd one out...which makes me the odd one out because I'm the only one that doesn't feel like the odd one out. So...what does it mean if we are all the odd ones out? What are we the odd ones out of? Methinks all three of us are just odd. 

I think the open questions idea will super help break down the sense of a private conversation - especially if we've also established that it is ok to tag people into the post. And once we start the actual doing, I figured that we would be sharing about how we are going with the doing (as much or as little as we want to share in Forum Land). 

I will now wander off and see if I can find where the link to the handouts is hiding online... 

[Phoenix_Rising]

@CheerBear and @Zoe7,

I found the online resources fine. You need to put the address in the browser address bar - it won't work if you put it in the search field. 

See if this works for you: https://www.guilford.com/companion-site/DBT-Skills-Training-Handouts-and-Worksheets-Second-Edition/9...

NOTE: I just tried clicking the link I inserted here and it took me to an error page. HOWEVER, I then copied and pasted the link into the browser address bar and it worked fine. I don't know enough about magic internet stuff to understand why this is so. Maybe @TheVorticon might know??? Anyway, let me know if it works for you. 

You need to register (which just means giving your email and creating a password). 

I just had a look at the limited duplication license in the front cover of the book of worksheets and we definitely can't post scanned copies of the worksheets in Forum Land. If we did that @NikNik or @Former-Member might have to come and bail us out of gaol. 

[Zoe7]

@Phoenix_Rising I am in total agreeance with you little turtle (omg that is twice today now - I really have been 'turtled' lol). I agree that we are all just ODD  ...and to be super honest with you - I am very much okay with that 

Just to clarify something - I did not mean that I would scan and post ALL the worksheets and handouts - just those that could not be found by members who are joinging us on our journey for certain parts. I understand that I in no way alluded to this in my post - that is my bad - too much of a rush to post and log off!! I am very well aware of copyright laws and feel very strongly that authors should be rewarded for their 'work' to be used (that is the reason I actually bought the book myself rather than finding the worksheets and handouts online). This is probably also a reason that my house is filled with more books than I have bookshelves (or even space) for them lol

[CheerBear]

Hi @Phoenix_Rising, @Zoe7 and all. This is a bit of a not-post really as I am currently managing the after effects of a huge hit of unbelievably unhelpful energy from my broken alert panic escape danger alarm system. It's pretty intense. I will get through it, but this morning is hard going.

It happened at "wind down it's sleep time soon" o'clock last night. I think it was the whole relax = cause for major panic pickle I get in to sometimes, and the house bus visited me again. My words weren't working so I couldn't really write about it here, and I reached out but found closed doors. I was spiralling when your goodnight email came through Phoenix_Rising. I have no idea how I could have taken in anything at all, in the state I was in but I read about you being close to calling someone a melted snowflakey banana head which made me laugh-cry and then I read "practice my distress tolerance skills". So I did that also and got through.

Today is hard. I'd flagged this week as being one that was really likely to be hard too, which it has been, so at least I'm not surprised. Maybe it will be better this afternoon once the inspection is over and I've met with my MH worker after it. I'm crossing everything that it will be, and also staying thankful that this is Earth which has 168 hours in a week, rather than Venus which way more more hours in a week than I can calculate. Does it even have weeks?

I'm going to listen to some Audible now in a bean bag in a nest in a fluffy blanket until the inspection. So cool to read you've been listening also Phoenix_Rising 🙂 Zoe - there's another one if you're interested (which is both awesome but kind of challenging too so it comes with a warning sign 😉 )

Hope the rest of the morning/day goes ok enough for all.

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hugs n hugs @CheerBear ..... ♥️


Hi everyone 💕

[Phoenix_Rising]

Hi @CheerBear,

It super sucks that you are sitting with unhelpful energy from your broken alert panic escape danger alarm system today. I am still sitting with the how-the-hell-could-someone-say-something-so-amazingly-unhelpful feelings from last night too. So...I guess we can sit with our gigantic feelings together but not.

I super hope the inspection goes well and that the person is not a melted snowflakey banana head. I wonder who amongst us is going to crack first and use that term in real life.

Yay for not living on Venus. Seven days on Venus would = 40,824 Earth hours, which would = 243 Earth weeks, which would = 4.67 years. So once again, YAY for not living on Venus.