3.49am.<br>Double Aaarrrggghhh!!!!!<br>I can't sleep. I can't stand it anymore. <br>I ask both night nurses if I could go out and have a smoke. <br>NO!!!! But they will give me a lozenge to help with any craving. I don't want a bloody lozenge - I want a **bleeping** cigarette.<br>I'm a god damn adult and I'm not alliwed to have a cigarette when I want one.<br>If I was in a general Hospital, I would be able to walk out and have a cigarette when I want one. Not bloody fair.<br>I didn't argue with the nurse. I simply cried and turned away and walked back to my bed.<br>This is a part of the psychiatric hospital stay where you have no say over your treatment and choices. Where you are treated like a baby (at the age of 46) & not given your rights as a human being - to choose to live as you want. <br>It's not too much to ask to go out to the smoko courtyard and have a ciggie..t;br>It's what I do at home. Can't sleep. Go outside and have a smoke. Then go to bed.<br>I'm pissed off.