That sounds chaotic and traumatizing @Phoenix_Rising
It seems as if being "sound" means you cannot be yourself - and with therapists at least we need to be sound.
I am sorry all of this has happened to you - and if and only if you sound grumpy - you are entitled to feel that way
I remember one terrible day when the world did not go the way I needed it to I yelled and cried in public - of course this didn't help at all - but I remember the dead end was really harsh - and I guess that life is this way for you often
I care
Dec