Thank you for dropping by @Former-Member. 
@CheerBear I actually was playing with data for most of the day. The weight of my muddle just fell very heavily very quickly. I like TTT such a lot...but the muddle is so big now. Being dumped by my turtle whisperer has added a whole new gigantic layer to the muddle. I don't see how it is that she and her boss can't see this. I mean they ARE psychologists! You'd think they'd have some idea! But no, their attitude seems to be that I have TTT now so it doesn't matter at all that yet another person has walked out of my life in such a super unhelpful way.
I still keep getting flashbacks of the moment when I was begging my turtle whisperer not to do this. But she did, and my soul has died, and now I don't even know what "getting better" looks like anymore. 