Am Not Coping

[Zoe7]

stupid is probably a better word than fearless @Catcakes @Faith-and-Hope LOL

As for ups and downs on the forum - we all have them in some form or another - but the community here keeps bringing most of us back - sometimes it is about just connecting with those you feel closest to and other times you can spread your wings further - it really does depend on the individual and self-care is extremely important. That is something that can often take a little longer to realise for the individual's well-being on here with all that we go through with others @Catcakes but you seem to be negotiating that particular part of the forum quite well yourself - something else to tell your psychologist maybe - you are realising when self-care needs to be done outside of the forum as well as using it for support 

[Faith-and-Hope]

I appreciate that @Catcakes. The psychologist I have been to see has been great ..... not that there has been much he or I can do ..... in my situation it has been more about him listening and validating both how I feel, and the choices I have made along the way. It must be so hard to come away with negative experiences from such a vulnerable interaction basis.

[Zoe7]

I was just as 'stupid' on the basketball court @Faith-and-Hope - and the netball court but I only played that for a few years - it wasn't a sport I ever really liked.

@Catcakes I think you have moved on from asking for moderator help now that you have a better understanding of how the forum works as a peer-to-peer support network. Although we see the moderators 'popping in' every now and then their primary role is 'behind the scenes' in keeping the forum as safe as possible for everyone. 

Hopefully you having some positive things to tell your psychologist could start a different dialogue with them - why is it more positive and how have you contributed to this yourself with your interactions here!

@Faith-and-Hope 

[Catcakes]

You probably wouldn’t believe it @Faith-and-Hope but I have had some shockers.
I try to leave it in the past now....
My current psychologist is highly skilled and I like her a lot but it’s still a battle to stay on track...
Just when I think things are going well 😣

[Faith-and-Hope]

I think you can see that we are living a “just when you think things are going well” existence too @Catcakes .....

I hope things even out for both of us much more this year ..... and for @Zoe7 too ......

I am going to dash out to the post office now. Mr has gone to a sports masseuse .... so I am waiting to see if they send him to the dr to have his back checked out ..... so rather than just sitting around, I am going to do that little bit of walking. Back in a while, but I will check in my phone while I am out too .....

[Catcakes]

I’m not sure @Zoe7 but I’ll take your comments as positive and have a think...

[Zoe7]

Definitely positive @Catcakes 

I am going to head off for a while now too @Faith-and-Hope @Catcakes but look forward to chatting again later. I hope the rest of this afternoon is a good one for both of you (might have a picture of 'our beach' for you later @Faith-and-Hope - @Catcakes you can cyber walk our beach with us if you like )

btw @Catcakes 'our beach' is the beach I take Toby to and I post pictures to F&H in the hope one day we can actually walk along it together 

[Sakurapuss]

When is the right time to ask for help? I want to fix myself but I know I need some help. But I don’t want to be one of those people everyone avoids because they’re always so negative and needy. My head hurts. And what is help? Someone to just say ‘suck it up princess?’ I want to be taken seriously, and not treated like a number.

[Christopher64]

I tried to fix myself as well ....and failed. You need to speak to your GP. They might provide you with the help you need.  And if they prescribe medication and you have negative side effects - go back and ask for something else. And if they refer you to a psychologist / psychiatrist - attend a few sessions and see how you feel . Sometimes just a one on one rant with an impartial person can help. 

From personal experience I feel you just can't 'fix yourself'. You do need help. 

[Faith-and-Hope]

Hi @Sakurapuss

I agree with @Christopher64 ...... your GP is the usual starting point. They will listen to your concerns and either offer you treatment, or refer you to a specialist.

It can be hard when we have only the immediate people around us when the issues we are faced with are too overwhelming for usual problem-solving and sharing conversations amongst friends winds and family, or if those people are actually the source of our problems and there have been no good outcomes.